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Top Ten TV Writers And Producers Who Could NEVER Write An Episode Of The X-Files
10. David E. Kelley (Ally McBeal): `The best French kiss is when you`re physically capable of reaching your lover`s stomach with the tongue.` <BR>
9. Joss Whedon (Buffy): `I know you`re a demonic serial killer and stuff, but do you have a date for the prom?` <BR>
8. Kevin Williamson (Dawson`s Creek): `Do you acknowledge my preposterous adolescent idiosyncrasies are intrinsically connected to my abduction by extraterrestrials?` <BR>
7. Aaron Spelling (Melrose Place): `Make love with me right now or I`ll drain all the Testosterone out of your body!` <BR>
6. Aaron Sorkin (West Wing): `I am the president and I know about the aliens.` `You are the president and you know about the aliens?` `I am the president and I know about the aliens.` `You are the president and you know about the aliens.` <BR>
5. David Chase (The Sopranos): `I know I kill and torture people for a living and I won`t stop, capisco, but what I want to know is if we`re alone in the universe, doctor!` <BR>
4. Michael Crichton (ER): `Give this thing ten milligrams of TetraHydroCannabinol plus one milligram of Progesterone or it`s gonna eat us all!` <BR>
3. Steven Bochco (NYPD Blue): `You tell me where the f**king UFO is, you chicano ass, or I swear I`ll show ya how the f***ing anal probe works!` <BR>
2. Jerry Seinfeld (Seinfeld): `Why is it that aliens are always naked in the movies? Can`t they wear astronaut suits or something?` <BR>
1. Jeffrey Bell -- too late, I know...
